This has been a crazy week filled with appointments which meant lots of doing nothing but hurrying up and waiting. Much like my life these past few months, hurrying up to meet a deadline, hurrying up to get somewhere on time, hurrying up just to wait on the words to come.
Our little family pod gathered Sunday and shared a simple ham dinner. Comfortable, safe, and happy as stories were shared around the table. The oldest grandson newly back from a school trip to Paris (I didn’t fit in his suitcase to go along, I tried)😊The youngest just back from a weekend of showing his sheep, Harry, Knox, and Harley Quinn. What a trio.
My son in law celebrated his 50th this week as would have my son last Dec. One of those times in life when we question ourselves. I hated the prospect of turning 50. Didn’t want to talk about it or acknowledge it and then a most wonderful thing happened. My friends and family surprised me with a party. It changed my entire perspective on the day and the age. I was over the hill and ready to roll on, and roll I did.
I sat this Friday morning with a blank page staring back at me. Nothing wise and wonderful seemed to come. I realized that I have been stuck for a while. I miss the cottonwood trees, and I feel like the one outside my office is grieving the loss of its “family. While the one in the front yard is fully leaved out, green and alive in the fullness of spring, the one trimmed back several weeks ago stands stark naked. I talk to her every day, encouraging her to sprout new limbs, to push those leaves out to the sun.
This tree has stood as a companion in the landscape of my life offering beauty, shade, a sacred presence and quiet steadiness just outside my office. She is wise, wonderful, and shares her strength when I can’t find mine.
Maybe what I am witnessing is stress or maybe it is shock. I hope it is simply a slower return to life after being cut back, yet there is something inside me that is honoring the deeper possibility that this magnificent “being” is adjusting to the loss of close friends, to change, and to an altered world.
What matters most to me is this relationship with the living world, and relationships ask something of us. They ask to be seen, for us to take notice, to give thanks, to grieve when grief is called for, and to honor what has rooted itself in our lives, even when we must let things go.
This morning I fed her some tobacco and sage and selfishly pleaded that she stay. She has been my anchor in this place where I now live but I also gave her permission to be as she is meant to be, to journey as she is guided in our world.
May her leaves find their way to the light and fullness of another season.
What stands steadfast in your world? Or what needs to be pruned back or completely let go of? I’d love to know, if you’d like to share your stories in the comments.
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Vicki Dobbs is a bold and adventurous warrior walking a path of heart to manifest spirituality in everyday lives. She opens existential gateways for individuals to face their challenges and embrace these tests as the great teachers that they are.
Her goal is to see everyone walk in beauty and balance every day of their lives empowered by the voice of their own authentic truth.
Through Wisdom Evolution and Sacred Wisdom Workshops, Vicki creates opportunities for others to make deep personal changes through experiential classes, ceremony, sacred art and story. She endeavors to inspire others to create their lives intentionally. Vicki is an Inspirator of everyday awareness, an Instigator of spontaneous stories and a Connoisseur of Creativity. Gratitude and grace sprinkled with humility and humor are the medicine she brings to the world.
As an Elder, Teacher and Entrepreneur, Spiritual Coach, Ordained Minister and Crafter of Sacred Art and Tools, Vicki perceives life’s journey as an ever-upward spiraling ascension of the human spirit leading her to wisdom, wholeness and authenticity.
Her experience includes being trained in the Harner Method of Shamanic Counseling and the Pachakuti Mesa Tradition of Cross Cultural Shamanism. She is a Graduate Teacher and Mentor with the Lynn Andrews Center For Sacred Arts and Training and has been the Administrator and Writers Guide for Writing Spirit, the School.
Vicki is also an Artist of the Spirit Certified Spiritual and Energetic Life Coach, a Graduate Mentor in the AoS program and a founding member of HeatherAsh Amara’s Warrior Goddess Leadership Team and Facilitator of the Warrior Heart Practice.
Connect with Vicki here on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vickildobbsauthor